I shall soon discover if my baby is a boy or a girl. On most days, I pretend that it doesn't matter, but it does. My whole life changes with the discovery of this predetermined biological detail. Robots and dolls and crummy tees and frocks will one day give way to the smashthecarandyou'redead versus the holdonhoneythat'swaytooshortforchurch.
I shall sit tight now, twiddle my thumbs and wait agonisingly till the pixels pull together in low-res black and white glory to reveal my baby's presence or absence of a phallus.
